


Apocalypse Daydreams

by sunflowergalaxies



Series: Some Lives You Live, and Some You Leave Behind [4]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, F/M, Fallout style apocalypse, No Incest, also some pretty gnarly descriptions of bodies and mutated creatures, but its just to be safe, tagged as underaged but they won't really do the do, they aren't related, they're all gonna be one big fucked up family, until they're 17 ish
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2020-09-30 21:16:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20453675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunflowergalaxies/pseuds/sunflowergalaxies
Summary: In the wreckage of the world, Five and Vanya find their own little family.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Day 4: Family
> 
> It's ya girl, back with another au because apparently that's all I can write. I originally wrote this for Fiveya week but all my inspiration fucked off and I got busy with work/projects so yay here we go like, a month later. 
> 
> This is will probably have 4 chapters where they pick up the various other family members. 
> 
> Also as a side note, they're around 13 in this chapter.

**2035 - New York, New York**

Sunlight, what little could penetrate through the ever-present layer of soot and smoke in the sky, dappled the sidewalk under Five’s feet as he moved down the street, gun gripped firmly in his hands. Distant gunfire rang out through the buildings, far enough away that it didn’t worry him too much, but close enough to stay painfully aware of his surroundings. He had let down his guard before, and what did that get him? A bullet in the arm and a painful trip back to the Old Botanical Gardens. 

That had been the day he learned how to dig bullets out of wounds. A painful lesson Mother had insisted he learn, if he was going to be idiotic enough to wander around out there. Her words, of course. Five didn’t understand the appeal of hiding away in a dim greenhouse, huddled together with others too scared to go out and do what was necessary to survive. 

Maybe Mother was better off there. Five certainly didn’t give a shit, though. As far as he was concerned, that bitch could go rot in hell. It’s why, when he had left, he had taken her most prized possession. An antique Walther pistol, something she’d had since before the war. One last ‘fuck you,’ if you will. 

If he were honest, which he wasn’t, he would have admitted that a part of him regretted leaving. But only a minuscule part of him, the part that missed regular access to doctors and supplies; it was getting difficult to find ammo for some of his guns. He had freedom, though. No more punishments for not following exactly what Mother wanted, no more restrictions on where he could go. If that meant he’d have to leave some of his guns behind in favor of ones he could find ammo for, then so be it. 

The sound of shifting concrete caught his attention from up ahead, drawing him out of his thoughts. Lifting the gun to his shoulder, he inched forward. Adrenaline coursed through his body, his hands shaking ever so slightly as he walked. He wondered if it would ever stop feeling like this, if the inevitable confrontation between him and another person just as desperate would become pedestrian, normal. Ordinary. 

A girl stumbled out of the alley, a rifle far too big for her small frame clutched in her hands. Upon seeing him, she shouldered her gun immediately. Her eyes were wide, but unafraid, as she watched him, waiting for him to do something. They stared at each other for a moment before she spoke.

“What are you doing?” 

“The same as you, I suspect,” He replied, “scavenging.” 

“There’s nothing here.” Her voice was soft, and for some reason it didn’t seem like she wasn’t lying. 

“Yeah?” He raised a brow. 

“I used to live here. My father and I took everything of value from these houses awhile ago.” 

“Where’s your father now?” He tensed, alarms ringing in his head. This wouldn’t be the first trap someone’s made using a little girl as bait. He glanced over his shoulder, listening for anyone else moving through the rubble behind him. 

“Dead.” She shrugged. “Can we both agree we don’t want to shoot each other?”

“If you’d like.” 

“Then, can we count to three, put our guns down and go our separate ways?” 

He inclined his head. 

“Okay. One,”

“Two,”

“Three.”

Neither one of them moved. 

“Now I’m disappointed in both of us.” She sighed. It drew a laugh out of him, a genuine one, and she giggled a little in response, the tension between them easing considerably.

“What’s your name?” 

“Vanya. What’s yours?” 

“Five.” 

He wasn’t sure why, because it certainly wasn’t logical, but he felt like he could trust her. It’s why, even with her gun pointed at his face, he asked if she wanted to travel together for a little while. The tiny smile that crossed her face was adorable, though, and he found himself thinking of it as they walked down the street. 

He liked that she didn’t try to make conversation, instead focusing on their surroundings. She only spoke to clarify which direction to go on her map of the city, circles and crosses through many of the areas with labels in a sophisticated, if mostly illegible scribble that clearly wasn’t her own. 

It was refreshing. Back at the botanical gardens, whenever he had been allowed out it was only with Dot, who liked to talk loud enough to attract every desperate person to their location, wherever that happened to be. His last trip out with her was when he had gotten shot for the first time. But Vanya moved quieter than anyone he had ever seen, sharp focus mirroring his own. They worked together well. 

That evening they found a nice house, mostly standing still, to spend the night in. After checking all the rooms and barricading themselves in the one with the most ceiling, they settled on the ground and built a small fire. Dinner was two old MREs Vanya pulled out of her bag and a couple of vegetables he had taken from the botanical garden, close to going bad but not quite. Vanya wrinkled her nose but ate regardless, her brown eyes watching him intently. 

“We should try and head out of the city, eventually.” She said, between small bites of food. 

“Why?” 

“I heard it’s better out there, in the country. Less radiation, more light.”

“Who’d you hear that from?”

“The people in the old baseball stadium.” She shrugged, “There’s lots of rumors around the big settlements.” 

“What were you doing there?”

The stadium was closer than the botanical gardens, but they were a long way away from both, somewhere in what Vanya’s map called Queens. 

She frowned, looking away from him, “My dad brought me there.” 

A long, uncomfortable pause followed her words, and Five figured it was best not to pry. It was clear Vanya didn’t feel like talking about it. His thoughts drifted to his childhood; Mother was a sore spot for him too. So he changed the subject, asking her about what direction they needed to go to get outside of the city. According to her map they needed to cross at least one river, which meant they needed to find a bridge. 

“Well, we can’t go too far west,” Vanya said, “My dad said that the radiation is too high once you go into Brooklyn, here. Plus both of those bridges are completely destroyed. We’d have to go up and around through The Bronx.” 

“Did he have anything that could tell how much radiation there is?”

“There’s this,” She pulled out a small device, “It’s supposed to measure radiation in the immediate area, as well as what type. I don’t know how to use it though, Dad never taught me.”

“That was stupid of him.” Five said, “Were you supposed to just rely on him forever?”

“I guess.” Vanya shrugged, “He never liked me touching his things. He wouldn’t even let me use a gun until he got shot in the shoulder and couldn’t anymore.” 

“He sounds like an asshole.” Five said shortly. 

“Yeah, he kind of was.” 

“My mother is an asshole too.” 

“Guess we have that in common then.” Vanya smiled, nudging him in the side. “Do you want to keep watch tonight, or do you think we’re secure enough to not bother?” 

“I haven’t heard any gunfire in awhile, but I don’t think we should let our guard down. Do you want first watch or last?” 

“I’ll take last.” She stood, and he followed suit.

They set up their bedrolls, moving around each other smoothly. There was something odd about the way they worked together, something unique. He had never been in sync with someone like this before. Looking over at her, he decided he was going to stay.

~

It was terribly easy to fall into a routine with her. During the day, they would walk, ducking into any building that caught their interest. At night, they would find a suitable place to stay, set up their bedrolls and eat dinner, talking about anything and everything they wanted to. At first, it was just the usual bullshit ‘getting to know you’ questions, but he soon discovered Vanya had an intellectual curiosity much like his own, and their conversations shifted towards literature and science.

“I’m really glad we decided to stick together,” Vanya said one night, when they were camped inside a library that was mostly standing. “I never got to have conversations with my dad. He just wanted to lecture me, I was never allowed to voice my opinions.” 

Five blinked, “Why? You’re smart, and I enjoy arguing with you.” 

“Debating.” She corrected. 

“Debating, then.” He nodded. “No one’s ever kept up with me before.” 

“You must have been surrounded by idiots,” Vanya simpered, sarcasm clear in her voice. It doesn’t annoy him though, like it would have with anyone else. It amused him. He mock-rolled his eyes and stood up, grabbing his gun and walking toward one of the bookshelves. 

“I still am.” 

“Rude. I’m not going to share my strawberries with you now.” 

“You can’t entice me with your dried fruit, I grew up with the real thing. It’s not the same.” 

Vanya stuck a strawberry slice in her mouth pointedly, sticking her pink tongue out. Five just raised a brow before turning back to the shelf and looking at the books that were there. Most of them were pretty well preserved, if not a little dusty, for being in a partially exposed library for the last fifteen years. 

“What kind of books do you like to read?” He called over his shoulder. 

“I like them all. Why?” 

He grabbed a book, one of the trashier looking harlequin romance novels, and tossed it in her lap. “For you to read, when you're on watch.” 

Vanya’s face turned bright red as she saw the cover, her mouth forming silent words for a second before she finally exclaimed, “I am _not_ reading this!” 

“You said you liked them all.”

“I thought you meant sci fi, or historical, or something like that! Not...not sex scenes and poor writing!” She threw the book off her lap as if it had burned her, glaring at Five for a moment before she got up and practically dove into her sleeping bag. “I’m not dealing with you anymore. Goodnight.” 

“Night, Vanya.” He grinned widely.

While they were packing up the next morning, Five caught Vanya glancing longingly at the shelves. Books were dead weight, Five knew. Vanya did too, but it didn’t stop her from shoving a couple of books in her pack. For some stupid, sentimental reason, when she had her back turned Five grabbed some of the books she had wanted to take but lacked the room for, tossing them into his bag quickly. The smile she gave him when he handed her one was well worth the extra weight on his back.

~

Making their way out of the city proved harder than originally anticipated. Vanya’s map was helpful, but failed to mark some of the spots that were dangerous now, as opposed to when her father first notated the map. Several dozens of blocks that should have been clear were now filled with rubble, and there was a lot more raider activity than the map had warned. While neither Five nor Vanya were strangers to injury, it wasn’t fun digging bullets out of a squirming body with minimal medical supplies.

By the time they made it to the Bronx nearly a month later, they were running drastically low on supplies.

“We could go by the baseball stadium.” Vanya suggested, while wrapping Five’s arm with the last of their gauze. “They’d definitely help us. Last time I was there they wouldn’t let me pay for anything. They all treated me like a child.” 

“I hate condescending adults.” Five glared down at the map on his thighs. “But we need supplies. We’re almost out of supplements, too.”

“The stadium is over here.” Vanya pointed on the map, “We just need to cut over to this street and then it’s a straight shot down.” 

“Great.” Five’s tone was sarcastic. “You take the lead, you know this place better than I do.” 

Vanya grimaced, tugging her bandana back over her face and standing. She slung her rifle over her shoulder and tucked the map back into her pocket. “Let’s get this over with.” 

The stadium was a luminous beacon in the distance, practically glowing in the dim evening light. The surrounding blocks were more well-lit than it ever was during the day.

The closer they got, the more tense Vanya got, her little shoulders raising up more and more. She kept fidgeting with her hands and gun, footsteps faltering as she stepped over a patch of uneven concrete debris. Five reached out and grabbed her before she could fall, pulling her backwards by the strap of her bag. She nodded in thanks, expression softening slightly. 

About a half a block away from the entrance, they were interrupted. 

“You two! Stop!” Two men stepped out from behind the rubble, guns aimed at them. 

Vanya took her hands off her gun, pulling off her bandana. “We’re just looking to trade.” 

“They’re just kids, Jesus Christ.” Five heard one mutter. The other stepped closer, looking at them, lips pursed in a frown. 

“Come on. I’ll walk you guys into the stadium.” 

“It’s alright, I’ve been here before.” Vanya said, stepping around the man as he lowered his gun. Five followed, keeping his grip firm on his gun. The man eyed them but made no move to stop him as they passed. As they were walking away, he could hear the guards discussing them softly, pity evident in their voices. Five could tell he wasn’t going to like this place. 

The inside of the stadium was bustling, people moving all around between shoddily constructed stalls and shacks. Five had never seen so many people clustered together before. There were a fair amount of people in the botanical gardens, but never a crowd this size. The more enmeshed they got in the chaos, the more Vanya shrunk into his side, clearly uncomfortable. Unthinkingly, he reached out and grabbed her hand. She blinked, surprised, and looked over at him. He ignored her questioning gaze, instead looking for a doctor or vet or anything like that.

Vanya tugged lightly on his arm, guiding him over to a small shack. “We should try here first. Doctor Pogo was the one who I stayed with after my dad died.” 

The shack was small, light peeking through the numerous holes in the walls and ceiling, and in the center of the room was an old man hunched over a table, furiously writing. 

“Doctor Pogo?” Vanya called softly, her grip tightening on Five’s hand. 

“Vanya, is that you?” Pogo turned around, disbelief clear in his voice. “You’ve returned! We’ve been so worried about you!” 

He rushed over to Vanya, giving her a quick once-over and frowning at whatever he saw. Five made a face. Sure, she might be a bit skinny and short, but she wasn’t injured, so there was no reason for concern. 

“You’ve brought a friend back.” Pogo observed, looking over at Five. The frown deepened. “And you’re hurt.”

“We came for some medical supplies, if you have any. We can trade.” Vanya reached for her pack, but the doctor stopped her. 

“Nonsense. I’m not going to charge you for supplies or treatment. Come sit, I’ll examine your arm.” 

“It’s okay.” Vanya muttered to Five. He acquiesced, letting Pogo lead him over to an old examination table. Vanya trailed behind, reaching out for Five’s bag and gun as he shed them, jumping up on the table. Pogo disappeared for a moment, returning with gauze, some water and a cream of some sort. Gently peeling off the old gauze, he examined Five’s arm. 

“Did you bandage this, Vanya?” He asked, “It’s very good work.” 

“Thank you, Doctor Pogo.” Vanya ducked her head and blushed a little under the praise. 

After washing his wound off with water, Pogo re-bandaged the wound and turned towards Five. “What’s your name?” 

“Five.” 

“You don’t have a real name?”

“Five is my real name.” Five glared, reaching for his stuff as he slid off the table. 

“Of course, my apologies. I'm Dr. Pogo." Pogo nodded, then turned to Vanya, “I’m glad you came back, Vanya.”

“We aren’t staying.” Five said shortly, shrugging on his pack. 

“Five’s right. We just stopped for some supplies on our way out.” She sounded tense, as if she was expecting Pogo to try and stop them. 

“I promised your father I would take care of you after his death.” 

“Father didn’t care about me before he died, I don’t see why what he wanted after matters.” 

“Vanya…” Pogo sighed, “I worked with your father for many years before the war, and we remained friends afterwards. Reginald cared about you, in his own way. He didn’t want you to grow up having to live like this.” 

He motioned at her and Five vaguely. 

“We just need supplies, then we’ll be going.” Vanya’s voice was firm, lips drawn into a small frown.

“Okay.” Pogo relented, unhappiness evident on his face. He led them to a small sectioned off area, motioning to the shelves. “Take what you need. And know that you’re always welcome here, Vanya.” 

“Thank you, Doctor Pogo.” She hugged the man as Five began shoving supplies into their medical bag. 

They left as quickly as they could, Pogo drawing in Vanya for one more hug before letting her go. Her face was stormy as they exited the shack and skirted around the crowd of people. Five grabbed her and pulled her over to the alley between two buildings, where it was quiet enough to talk normally. 

“So you ran away?” 

“You did too.” She spoke defensively, crossing her arms. 

“I’m not judging you, V. I wouldn’t want to stay here either.” He glanced around, watching as the occasional person would look at them in concern. “They remind me of the people at the botanical gardens. Patronizing.” 

Vanya nodded in agreement, scrunching her nose. “Let’s just get out of here.” 

“It’s night, now.” Five glanced up at the sky, “We shouldn’t travel after sundown. It’s dangerous.” 

“There’s a bunch of beds under the stadium seats, I guess. We might even find one in a room, if we’re lucky. ” Vanya suggested, pointing to their left. He let her lead the way again, trailing close behind her through the crowd. It was still early enough in the night that they were able to find small room, what used to be an office by the looks of it, with a free mattress flopped on the floor. Vanya dove on to it excitedly, her grin wide. 

“It’s so comfy, Five.” She grinned, reaching for her sleeping bag, which she laid down like a bed sheet. He sat next to her, and Vanya tugged his from his pack and covered them both with it. “This is the nicest bed I’ve been on in forever.” 

She laid down, resting her head on her arms and watching as he squirmed around until he got comfortable.

It was a little strange to share a bed; he hadn’t slept next to anyone in years, since he was little and there were more kids than beds at the gardens. This was different though. It felt gently comforting to have Vanya’s warmth next to him, her bangs falling in her face as she whispered, “Goodnight, Five.”

“Goodnight.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay another chapter :3 The other siblings are gonna show up in the next chapter! Originally I intended them to be in this one but other ideas got in the way and had to happen first so.

**2036 - The Pitt, Pennsylvania **

Five idly watched as Vanya crouched down on the riverbank, holding the radiation detector as close as was safe. He grimaced. The air here stank. Their masks helped filter some of it, but there was still the distinct stench of chemicals and decay. Five had thought that they would get used to it as they were passing through, but this was the third day in the vicinity and they were both still choking on the smell of it. 

Vanya stood, examining the screen in her hands. He couldn’t see her mouth, but he knew by the crease between her eyebrows that she was frowning. 

“This water is… beyond unsafe,” She said. “Cesium, strontium…There wasn’t even a bomb here, was there? Where is all this coming from?”

“Rivers flow a long way, V.” Five shrugged. “How much water do we have left?”

“Two and a half gallons each. Five days worth for both of us as long as we continue rationing.” 

“We should get out of here as soon as possible, then.” 

“Agreed.” Vanya shivered, tugging her tattered jacket tighter around her. 

He frowned, watching her. They needed to stop and find warmer clothes. Five didn’t pay attention to the months, that was something only people from before did, but he did pay attention to the changing of the seasons. If he and Vanya were going to stay in the north through the winter, they needed to find a place to stay, wait it out. Their own little house, maybe. Far enough in the country no one would ever come by. It was a pleasant thought to daydream about while walking through this desolate city.

They quickly made their way back up the bank and back onto the road. There was something about the Pitt that Five found particularly unpleasant. Not just the smell, though that didn’t help things any. The closer they got to downtown, the more uneasy he felt about being here. He had seen a lot of things in his fourteen years. People in the late stages of acute radiation syndrome, people losing limbs, bodies rotting from the inside out. But there was a special kind of unsettling about this city, he just couldn’t figure out what it was.

Skin lesions had grown more common on the locals the closer they got to downtown. Something in the air, perhaps. Either way, Five didn’t want to stick around and find out. They just had to follow highway 376 out of the city and hopefully towards cleaner, less inexplicably irradiated parts of the country. If they pushed themselves, they could maybe get twenty miles a day, barring any unfortunate roadblocks or raider infested areas like the turnpike between 76 and 70. 

Abruptly, Vanya reached over, resting a hand on his arm to stop him. She was tense, gripping her gun tightly, her eyes surveying the road ahead of them. Her body language was enough to put him on edge, eyes darting between the large piece of broken asphalt. The air seemed to grow still, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood. 

“_Five_,” Her voice was urgent, pitched high in growing panic, “What is that?” 

He didn’t see it at first, scanning the road intently, but then he caught movement to the right. Automatically, Five lifted his rifle to his shoulder. Something was crawling out of the rubble, grotesque in form. It looked human, in a way, but its proportions were off. Its skin was papery and stark white, peeling away in parts to expose the muscle underneath. The creature walked on all fours, feet and hands twisted at unnatural angles as it moved. 

Vanya gagged next to him, hand rising to cover her mouth. The smell of it was nauseating, worse than any feral ghoul he had ever come across. It was putrid, rotten, like the decaying bodies often found on the sides of the road, but amplified by the strange chemical odor that permeated this city. The thing made a strange, oscillating noise, head tilting as if inspecting them. 

Then it spoke. 

“..._food_…”

Vanya made a high, startled noise in the back of her throat and shot it. It fell, and Five shot it again, just to be safe. The creature made no move to get back up, shuddering slightly as it bled out. Keeping the safety off, Five slowly approached it, ready to shoot if it moved. It didn’t, but its bloodshot eyes met Five’s for a second, and it uttered, “..._thank you_…” in its thin, gravelly voice before going still. 

Vanya crept up behind Five, staring in shock at the creature. 

“What the fuck.” He nudged it with his rifle. Its skin was mushy, and Vanya made a small noise in throat when the barrel sank into it slightly.

“I think it was human.” She choked out. She yanked her mask off and stumbled a few feet away before vomiting. Disgust and nausea curled if Five’s stomach as he wiped the gun barrel off on the ground. 

“You okay?” He looked at Vanya. She glanced over at him, nodding a little. 

“We need to get out of here.” Her eyes darted over to the creature, her face contorting into a grimace. “Please.” 

“Yeah,” He turned, then glanced back at the creature one last time, “Let’s go.” 

~

Five watched Vanya as she began dismantling her rifle, hands shaking so badly she could barely get any of the pieces apart to begin cleaning them. Her behavior today had been unusual, since the encounter with the strange creature, and the two more they had killed two more after it. She ordinarily didn’t have trouble with those sorts of things. Feral ghouls didn’t make her vomit like she had just seen her first dead body, and he had never seen Vanya this shaken before. 

It was worrying, to say the least. 

“Here.” He plucked the gun out of her hands. He disassembled it, handing the pieces back to her. Vanya just looked at him, her lips pursed. “Vanya-”

“Does everything seem louder to you?” She cut him off, her voice overly loud and her tone a forced kind of casual. “Like, in general?”

“It’s most likely just adrenaline,” Five reassured her, “We aren’t used to these new creatures yet, and we’re in a very stressful environment.”

Vanya looked down at the floor for a second, before saying, “You’re probably right.” 

He nudged her with his shoulder, an easy grin on his face. “You know I’m always right.” 

“You wish.” She rolled her eyes and gave him a tiny smile. The tension in her shoulders eased as she cleaned her gun, though her hands still shook ever so slightly while slotting the pieces of it back together. 

Dinner was another bland MRE and a disappointingly small amount of water, but Vanya didn’t finish either of them, shoving away her water bottle with a grimace. Five watched silently, anxiety growing over Vanya. Now was the worst time to get sick, with winter fast approaching, and them still being far too close to the Pitt for his comfort. Especially if, as he suspected, it was because of the area that she was getting sick in the first place. 

Vanya yawned, glancing towards the boarded up windows of the motel room they were in for the night. “We don’t need to keep watch tonight, right?”

“Not unless you want to, no.” 

“Good.” Vanya nodded. 

Five felt a little bit of relief when she unzipped her bag and laid it down like a sheet, throwing his over the top of it. He slept better when he shared a bed with Vanya, though their travel meant those times were few and far between. It would be a lie to say that he wasn’t looking forward to getting a solid amount of sleep curled up next to her. 

Five blew out their makeshift lantern, crawled next to Vanya and slipped under the cover, reaching out in the dark to find her hand. 

Even though it was early still, the day had been long and stressful. At least now they were far enough away from downtown that they could afford to sleep in a little bit before leaving tomorrow. With any luck, Vanya would be better after a good night’s rest. 

She seemed better the next day, less pale and more steady-handed. Her cheeks even flushed when they woke up and she was laying halfway on top of him. She practically flew off the bed, sputtering excuses and apologizing, and every time they made eye contact she would blush again. 

Five felt less and less worried as she continued to improve over the next couple of days, except for her still strangely sensitive hearing. He had attributed it to stress, initially, but they were far out of the city now. Aside from the occasional feral ghoul and those creatures, which the locals called trogs, there wasn’t any danger. 

Still. Whatever it was, Vanya had gone back to normal otherwise by the time they reached the Ohio river. They stopped on the far shore, desperately low on water. While Vanya tested the water and set up their bottles with her jury-rigged filters, Five notated their map, marking the various raider camps and trog-heavy areas they had gone through. Not as thorough as Vanya’s father’s map, but good enough for their purposes. 

“This water is much cleaner.” Vanya commented, returning to their temporary set up along the riverside. 

“Good.” He glanced up at the sky, “We should be done before nightfall, right? I think we should just set up here for the night. There’s a hotel right past the bridge.” 

“Alright.” 

“There’s a library around here too. I know you need new books.” 

Vanya looked up at him, brow raised in surprise. “Yeah. I do.” 

“Don’t look so surprised, V. I didn’t survive this long by being unobservant.” 

She rolled her eyes, digging through her bag. “Whatever. Give me one of yours to read?” 

“They’re all physics books.” 

“Ew.” Vanya wrinkled her nose.

“You asked. You want it or not?”

“No. I’m gonna bathe, if you don’t mind keeping watch. Have fun with your boring formulas.” 

Five nodded, picking up his ‘boring formula’ book and quickly getting lost in the pages. It wasn’t often they got a chance to relax fully, especially recently. For weeks it had been constant movement: avoid the raiders, detour through the city, avoid the trogs. Then there had been the stress of Vanya’s short-lived sickness. 

The thought of it still made him a bit nervous. But Vanya was better now. Still, he was overcome with a sudden need to reassure himself that she was fine, and he glanced up to look for her, only remembering at the last second that she was bathing. 

Vanya’s back was towards him, the expanse of pale skin uninterrupted until it met the water. She shifted, and he watched in fascination as her muscles moved smoothly underneath her skin. While they had seen each other in various states of undress, usually it was tearing off clothes to treat a wound before it got too bad. It was different, somehow, seeing her in the dull light of day without any urgency. Part of him knew he shouldn’t be watching this, it was obviously a private moment, but he couldn’t look away. He couldn’t tell if the roar in his ears what his blood or the current of the river rushing over the rocks near her. 

His cheeks felt hot, his mouth dry, and then Vanya turned slightly, just enough that he could see the curve of her-

Five came to his senses, his brain finally catching up, and he quickly turned his eyes back to his book. His face felt like it was on fire as he desperately tried to get the image of naked, bathing Vanya out of his head. But it was stuck in his mind, practically burned into his brain. 

He sat there, eyes firmly glued to the same page he’d been staring at for the past ten minutes, until he heard Vanya’s soft footsteps approaching. Glancing towards her, he felt his face heat up again and he looked away. 

“Are you alright?” Vanya asked, worry coloring her voice, “You look hot.”

Her cool hands cupped his cheeks, one sliding up to rest on his forehead. His heart fluttered stupidly in his chest, and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. She was so close, why was she standing so close? Had she always gotten this close before?

“You feel warm.” Vanya frowned, “I told you you should have slept with the extra blanket.” 

“I’m fine.” He said gruffly, nudging her hands away from his face, trying to put some distance between them. Unfortunately for him, Vanya thrived on physical affection and closeness, so she didn’t back away very far. Instead, she settled next to him on the ground, thigh barely touching his. It was hard to focus for some reason, with her next to him. There was an undeniable urge thrumming through him to _touch_ her, a strange sort of tension he hadn’t really felt before growing between them. 

He pressed his thigh against hers more firmly, feeling strangely pleased when she didn’t move away from him. She didn’t even seem to notice, her eyes out on the river. Her body went stiff, lines of tension easily visible.

“There are some people over there.” 

“What?” He glanced over, trying to see what she was looking at. They were hard to see, at first, but he caught the movement of two people walking towards them. Grabbing his gun, he watched with a forced air of calm as they approached. When they cleared the treeline, one of them, the man, called over, “Hello there!” 

Vanya slowly reached for the pistol Five had given her. “What do you want?” 

“We’re just here for the water.” The man shrugged, “That’s an interesting set up you’ve got there. Charcoal only, or?”

“I use sand and gravel too.” Vanya replied hesitantly. 

“Smart.” He nodded. “Do you mind if we come over there? The shore here is...rocky.” 

Vanya looked at Five, tilting her head slightly towards the pair. Five grimaced. He knew Vanya well enough that they didn’t need to speak for him to understand what she was thinking. She was too kind to random strangers for his liking, even if that had once benefited him. But they didn’t own the shore, and they couldn’t truly stop the pair from going where they pleased, so he might as well at least keep this interaction friendly and gun-free. He nodded once, but made a face at Vanya that told her he didn’t like it. Vanya’s mouth twisted into something vaguely apologetic, before she turned back to the pair. 

“That’s fine. The bridge is down that way.” She pointed up river.

“Thanks.” The man waved. 

Five and Vanya watched as the pair disappeared back into the trees. He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

~

The pair, Hazel and Cha Cha, were surprisingly tolerable for adults. As a rule, Five avoided interacting with adults simply because nine times out of ten, they would speak to him and Vanya with such pity in their voices, going on about how they shouldn’t have to be running around with guns. At one of the settlements they stopped at, someone had even tried to tell them that they needed to stay, and insisted they go to the school they had set up. 

There was nothing Five hated worse than condescension. 

But he was getting along with these adults rather well, and something about that confused him. They talked to them as if they were people, and didn’t act like it was some gross injustice that Vanya and Five traveled on their own. He felt himself relaxing more and more around them as they sat on the shore, idly talking while waiting for their water to filter. 

Still, he was more than a little suspicious when Hazel asked them what direction they were headed, and he revealed they were going the same way for a little bit. 

“It’s only a weeks worth of travel,” Vanya argued, whispering to him away from the other two. “We could split up watch into shorter segments." 

“We don’t know them.” 

“You didn’t know me when we met.” 

“That’s different. I had just left the gardens, I didn’t know how badly it could have turned out. I do now.”

“It’s not permanent. If they do anything weird, we’ll just ditch them.” 

Vanya wasn’t backing down, and while normally Five never shied away from arguing, he had been developing a large headache all afternoon and he wasn't sure it would be worth it to drag this out. “Fine. But we’re going to split up watch into groups of two. One of us and one of them for the first few nights. I don’t trust them to not steal our things and run off.” 

“Alright,” Vanya agreed readily, a small smile on her face. “Thank you."

"Yeah. Let's just go." 

~

Hazel and Cha Cha proved to be better companions than Five expected. While they were tight-lipped about their past, Five couldn’t blame them. He and Vanya were as well. There were some things he kept even from Vanya, mostly relating to things he’d had to do that he wasn’t proud of, shortly before he met her. 

Aside from that, Hazel and Cha Cha were good at fighting, good at basic survival skills, and good at keeping quiet and not filling the silence with annoying chatter. Despite his initial reservations, they seemed decent. Enough so that after the first few nights, Five agreed to split watch into four shifts, rather than two. It went well for the first couple of nights, until-

Five sighed as he woke up, nuzzling into his pillow. It was so bright, a lot brighter than when Vanya normally woke him up. The dreamy haze of semi-consciousness shattered as his brain caught up and realized something wasn’t quite right. Bolting upright, he glanced around, fear growing in his gut. 

He was alone. Vanya’s sleeping bag was next to his, but everything else was gone. His bag was empty, contents thrown around their makeshift camp. For a moment, he thought Vanya might have just left him, but her rifle, the one she insisted on using even though he had better ones that were lighter and easier to shoot, was next to the fire pit. Vanya would never willingly leave that gun behind, even if she never could find ammo for the damn thing. He quickly put the pieces together.

Hazel and Cha Cha. 

Five _knew_ there was something off about them, but Vanya had made her case for bringing them along. She always had been too trusting. Apparently, so had he. 

He gathered his things as quickly as he could, fear quickly melting into an icy, cold anger. They hadn’t bothered to cover their tracks; it was easy to find three sets of footprints headed in the direction of the highway, one set smaller and deeper than the other two. Vanya’s gun on his back, his own in hand, he jogged after them. 

Vanya was leaving him clues, he was sure of it. At the highway, where the dirt turned to pavement, there was a corpse of a feral ghoul and a set of tiny, bloody footprints headed towards the Pitt. A couple miles later, he found the tiny figurine of a violinist propped up near the off-ramp. He had given it to her when they were looting some gift shop. He could still remember the pleased smile she gave him, always so unused to receiving anything just because. He frowned, examining the figurine and remembering the joy on Vanya’s face, before shoving it into his pocket and moving on. 

Night fell as he crossed the river into the city. The trogs and ferals were more active at night, but he couldn’t- wouldn’t stop. Not until he found Vanya. He would fight his way through a million mutated creatures to get to her, Hazel, and Cha Cha. He was going to kill those two, and he was going to enjoy it.

By the time the sun rose, he was already getting close. The bodies he came across were less decayed, the spent casings of bullets still scattered on the ground at his feet, blood footprints trailing from every single one. Vanya had gone out of her way to step in the blood and leave a crystal clear trail. She was clever, he thought proudly. 

A sudden round of gunfire echoed through the buildings, not more than a couple blocks away. Heart pounding, Five ran towards the gunfire. He could hear the muffled sounds of conversation as he approached, slowing down as he turned towards one of the side streets.

“You’ve been leading him right towards us this whole time, haven’t you?!” He heard Cha Cha yell. 

There was a loud thud and a pained grunt that Five was certain came from Vanya. He snarled, rounding the corner with his gun out. In the center of the street, Cha Cha was holding a gun to Vanya’s head. 

“Behind you!” Vanya cried out, trying desperately to squirm out of Cha Cha’s grip. Five felt the cool metal of a pistol against the back of his head. He froze, his heart pounding, fear and adrenaline spreading through his body rapidly. Vanya struggled against Cha Cha until she pressed the barrel more firmly to Vanya’s temple. 

“Now let's just talk this out like civilized folks.” Hazel said calmly, yanking the gun from Five’s hand. 

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Cha Cha glared at her partner, “The Handler doesn’t care what happens to him, only the gun.”

“I’m not gonna kill a kid.” 

“Oh, don’t pretend like you have morals, Hazel.” Cha Cha rolled her eyes. 

“Excuse me? I wasn’t the one who…” 

Five tuned out their argument, focusing on Vanya. Her eyes were wide, panicked, her whole body shaking. The wind picked up, whistling through the ruined buildings. He shivered, trying to think of a way out of this mess. 

Vanya looked like she was struggling to breathe, and Five unconsciously reached for her. She looked at his hand, then up to his face, her eyes watery. 

‘It’s okay,’ He mouthed. 

Vanya shook her head, lips drawn into a trembling frown. There was a high pitched ringing in his ears. Similar to the one he heard after he shot his gun, but not quite the same. It grew louder, and the wind grew stronger, blowing hard enough Five had to brace himself in an effort to not be moved by it. 

“So just shoot the prick and be done with it!” Cha Cha yelled. 

“No!” Vanya screamed. 

It was completely silent for a second, the air growing unnaturally still, and then the ringing in his ears came back full force, unbearably loud. The wind all rushed towards Vanya, and _something_ radiated out from her, a rush of power that threw Cha Cha back against the wall. She hit it with a sickening crack, body slumping down onto the ground. 

Hazel’s gun had lowered from Five’s head in shock, and he spun, disarming him. 

“Vanya, are you okay?” Five called, glancing over his shoulder. 

Vanya was standing there, eyes wide, but she nodded shakily. “I’m fine.”

“Good.” Five turned back towards Hazel, “Now, time to deal with you.”

He heard the soft crunch of Vanya’s footsteps as she walked to him, nervous energy practically radiating off of her. “Let him go. It wasn’t his idea to take me, it was hers.” 

“Vanya, they kidnapped you. I thought-” He cut himself off, unable to say what he had feared out loud. That he would never see her again, that he would find her body along the side of the road, lifeless brown eyes staring up at him, that he would lose the one person he genuinely cared for. 

Vanya slipped her hand over his, squeezing gently. “She wanted to kill me, he convinced her not to. Let him go, please.” 

Five closed his eyes, breathing in deeply. Here she was, pleading for a man’s life even after being kidnapped by him. Vanya was a better person than this world deserved. “Fine. Get out of my sight. If I see you again, I _will_ kill you.” 

“I’m done doing favors for your mom, kid. Believe me.” Hazel shook his head. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.” 

“Leave. I don’t care.” Five snapped, turning his attention to Vanya as Hazel jogged away towards the main street. “Vanya, what was that?”

“I don’t know,” She whimpered, looking at the ground. “I was just so scared, and everything was so loud. I could hear your heartbeat and I just... focused on it. It felt like there was all this energy inside me that needed to be released, and then she told him to shoot you and I couldn’t- I can’t- Five-” 

Vanya choked out a sob, covering her mouth in an attempt to keep quiet. Five drew her into his arms, holding her head as she buried her face in his neck and cried. Slowly, ever so slowly, some of the tension drained from her. 

It was troubling, this strange power that came from her; he didn’t know what could have caused this, besides maybe some strange mutation. That thought was even more troubling. They always avoided the higher radiation areas, and Vanya was religious about both of them taking supplements to keep their radiation absorption as low as possible. But if there was enough background radiation to give a human superpowers, then maybe radiation poisoning was where they were heading regardless. 

He couldn’t tell Vanya his thoughts about this now, not while she was so obviously terrified of what had just happened. So he just pressed his lips to the crown of her head, holding her as she cried until she couldn’t anymore. Then she pulled back and took a deep, wavering breath. 

“They wanted a gun. The pistol you gave me to use when I hurt my shoulder with the rifle. They took me for insurance that you wouldn’t kill them when you found them.”

“That’s stupid. I couldn’t give a shit about that gun.” Five said, “I wouldn’t have followed at all if they hadn’t taken you.”

“It’s apparently pretty valuable,” Vanya shrugged. “I’m just...so glad you found my trail. It was hard leaving one without them noticing.” 

“Oh.” He had forgotten. “Here.” 

He reached into his pocket and took out the figurine, placing it in her hand. He smiled, watching as she stroked her fingers over it softly, beaming. Then he realized- 

“Vanya, your lip,” He murmured, grabbed her chin and tilting her head back so he could see it better. 

The gash through her upper lip was still a bit bloody, and very deep. Her hand fluttered over it, fingers skimming over the blood. 

“I didn’t notice…” She said, frowning. “It hurts now.” 

“The adrenaline’s wearing off. It probably needs stitches. And it might scar.” The thought of it bothered him. He should have kept her safe. Sure, scars were unavoidable sometimes. They both had their fair share littered across their bodies, but her face…

This shouldn’t have happened. He should have been better prepared, shouldn’t have trusted Hazel and Cha Cha. He got complacent, and Vanya paid for it. 

“It can’t be helped now.” Vanya’s voice was gentle, “So stop looking so upset about it.” 

“Vanya, I’m-”

“Don’t say sorry. It’s not your fault.”

“I should have known better.” 

Vanya sighed, “That’s not true. Can we argue about this later? I don’t want to stay in this city any longer.” 

They walked until it was nearly dark, ducking into the remains of an old gas station. Most of the buildings were empty, but after the day they had, Five and Vanya double checked every single room before barricading themselves in the storeroom. Five glanced over at Vanya as they removed all their bags and set up.

“Are you still feeling okay?” 

“Yeah…” She said, looking down, “My head hurts and I’m starving, but I feel better than I have in the past couple of days.” 

“Whatever that was, it probably took a lot of energy,” He said, reaching into his bag and pulling out their selection of food. “If you’re up for it, I’d like to experiment tomorrow. See if you can do it again.”

“We should figure it out. But...I’m scared, Five. What’s happening to me?” 

“I don’t know, but we’ll figure it out. Together.” He squeezed her hand. “We can’t stay here, though. If Hazel and Cha Cha were sent by my mother...We need to get as far away from her as possible.” 

“There’s a lot of maps in front.” Vanya suggested. “We could choose from them.” 

They un-barricaded the door enough to slip out and look at the map stand. They could go anywhere they pleased.

“What about here?” Vanya lifted up a map of California. “Can’t get any further west.” 

Five nodded. “Alright. We'll make a plan tomorrow. Tonight, we need to rest.” 

As if on cue, Vanya yawned, “Yeah. I’m exhausted.” 

“Eat first, then I’ll look at your lip. _Then_ you can sleep.” 

It was a testament to how tired Vanya was that she didn’t push back even a little bit at his commanding tone. She just nodded, letting Five guide her back into the store room and shove food into her hand. She ate without comment, dark eyes on the ground. It seemed fairly obvious to him that the events of the day were weighing on her; they probably would for the near future. He knew they would for him too. He hadn’t considered what he would do without Vanya before, she was simply a given in all his thoughts. He frowned, taking another bite of his food. He would be more careful from now on, he promised her silently. 

“What are you looking at?” Vanya’s voice made him flinch, realizing he had been staring at her.

“Nothing,” He replied too quickly, “Just thinking about whether I’ll need to stitch your lip.” 

“It doesn’t feel that bad anymore.” Vanya met his eyes, but he knew she was lying. Vanya was a terrible liar. She wore her heart on her sleeve, and her lip always pulled down a little when she wasn’t telling the truth. 

“I’m still going to look at it.” He said firmly. 

“Fine.” Vanya rolled her eyes, tipping her head back. “Let’s just get it over with.” 

He could tell even without examining it closely he was going to have to stitch it, which was a shame because out of the two of them, Vanya was better at suturing and taking care of wounds. She had picked up a lot from her brief time at the stadium. Still, she sat without complaint as he carefully sutured the small wound, her eyes closed and her face surprisingly relaxed.

“Try not to talk too much until it heals,” He snarked, as he put away their medical bag. 

Vanya rolled her eyes, but smiled a little as they set up their sleeping bags together. Five laid down next to her, smiling as she reached for his hand. He sighed, closing his eyes. Her warm hand in his was just another reassurance that she was here, she was safe. It was easy to fall asleep that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cha Cha: Tell us where the gun is, and I’ll kill Vanya and burn your house to the ground.
> 
> Hazel: Don’t you mean or?
> 
> Cha Cha, irritated: Tell us where the gun is, or I’ll kill Vanya and burn your house to the ground. 
> 
> Five: Well, which is it? That sounds like a pretty crucial conjunction.

**Author's Note:**

> I kind of hate this lol and I couldn't think of anything funny to put here :( so I'll just say that I have nothing against harlequin romance novels, but there are some reallllllllly bad ones out there haha


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